khim.just my life.

school pics :(((

2009-06-20T00:12:00.000-07:00

so much for LOVE...

2009-06-11T22:46:00.000-07:00

after ten years of not going online.grr.can;t blog that long.
but yea, im so sad.
he's so mean :( grrrr...!

can't blog.sorry.

missing jy :(

2009-06-07T02:20:00.000-07:00

im here now in manila.ahuhuhu :((( i miss jyjy so much! i swear. oh well, im not loosing hope that i'll see him again, sometime on march. hayyyss!
i hate this place. it's not my home! grrr! why does summer have to be over that fast? it seems like i came back from my yesterday :(( hayys. i can't update that much, cuz' im gonna be busy from school :(( hell is coming.

goodbye lae :(

2009-06-04T15:00:00.000-07:00

3.6.09
what happened.yesterday, i didn't go out. i thought i could have a time to pack my things up already, but lazyness attacked me again. grr!waaa:((im a such a big pretender! im sad.really.really sad! there's nothing left worth for me to be happy.to make a huge smile:( to laugh out loud.no more:(im so not over him! im so hurt because of him? did i love him too much!? is it wrong to love him too much that i can't even move on with my life?why? what's up with him!? argggggghhhhhhhh!
well, today.this afternoon,derek and jyle went to 212, so i was fored to go too. tito wen dropped me at 212. jyle was there,aw he's so cute.sad ya! i'll be leaving him :( hayys. why is my life like this? why is it that im always hurt? i just wish that i'll find a world where there would only be HAPPYNESS. i'd rather live there forever! .im broke :((((((((((((((((

happened yesterday.farewells.
today if the fifth of june.yesterday was chrys and i's farewell party. oh wait.was mine a party?heehee :) this is how things happened.in the morning, me,chrys,and mom roamed around the lae to buy the
things that are left to buy.at lunch, i was only supposed to go to school, but then chrys went too.
haha. we forced her too.i was eating with bea,JYLE!,mariah,manisha,meesha,sol and jami.jami hates me. but it's okay. it's good enough that i dont feel the same
way. haha. and yea, derek came to our table.haha. derek asked jyle who he likes, jyle wasn't answering, then derek
asked,"do you like khim?" at first he wouldn't answer,but derek kept
asking the question so he said, "YES!" aw :( haha. jyle is the 2nd person
i'll miss here at lae. we planned to all go to 212. at least me and pat's
farewell THING. ahaha.derek was suppose to pick me up at 3pm, but then his car didn't show up,
so i asked my mom, and she said yes. jyle called me ad said derek's so
long at picking him up.so i decided to pick jyle up.
at 212, sol was there singing.haah.she's really funny.i'll miss that girl alot
:(( so yea, derek came,at last! anyway, did i tell you guyz that mom
bought chrys and i a new phone! heehee :) am i showing off? sorry. haha.but yea, it's not planned to buy, we were just talking about it yesterday
morning. hayy. it's both sony ericson. watever. so yea, we went up to pat's room. turned the music on and make love.lol no! um, jyle and i were sitting together, while pat and derek, bea and
sol. haha. jyle was bored. so i just interrogated him about US. haha. bea
asked him," do you like khim," and i said, "yes,he said yes [laugh]" ,jyle
said, "yes." :((((((((((((( why is this happening.as usual.derek and pat are having their moments as usual. they won't see each
other anymore. :((( if you guyz are confused why were having this
farewell thing. it's because chrys and i are leaving today, this afternoon.
and pat just left this early morning :(were going to P.O.M, then tomorrow,were travelling back to Philippines
:((( at night, jyle,derek,and sol came with me at home. mann. the house is
messed up. chrys's friend are still there.oh well, after hours, i got sad
and depressed. they all left.jyle left without even saying bye :(so yea, i was really depressed all night til' now. why is it that having your loved ones far away from you always a part of my life :(it hurts me.

my wishes before i leave:

to see mr. misterious guy :)))))

to spend time with jyle :(

see joshua at P.O.M

buy my blower :)

to visit LCA for the very last time :(((

to flirt with him.whaatt?? haha.is this really my wish?hahait means just have fun.haha

to eat timtam :(

be on my internet life at prima. i'll wish my internet life :(

be with my friends at least for the rest of my left times.

and of course, be with my mom :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

*i don't know what else is next to happen, but whatever it is.i dont care!

bea said, "IT'S SAD YOUR GOING THROUGH THIS THE SECOND TIME AND SO DO WE "this is my fear :( can't

help but to cry,cry,cry :((
i'll put pictures of me and jyle later.

pictures.from my phone :((((

2009-06-02T00:31:00.000-07:00

danica and i.sa clasroom :)))))

ahem.ahem.derek and pat.naksss.heehee :)

aw.sa swing. march 11.happy day with matt.

me.loving aprille's glasses.hahahahah

so dark.

aw :(((((((((((((((((((((((((( kimatt!

aw.memories.crying moments =(

me and micah.the funny sleepover :)

waaaaaaaa! hate that!

secret admirer co.owww? hehehehe.sa library.

happenings of not blogging in two days :(((

2009-06-02T00:22:00.000-07:00

yahoothis was typed the other day.

yesterday.i feel so flirty!aghhh! please! i can't explain ya! too public! i swear! i don't like what's going on between people. grrr. lets say, there's this two couple who doesn't have time to see each other.and then there's this girl who would always be around with the boy. the boy was bored not seeing his loved one, he tried to play up with the girl who he's hanging out with most of the times. but the play up for the boy turned out to be in the serious situation..the girl,the one he's hanging out with, doesn't want what the boy was doing, but then she just let him do it. ggrrrrrrr! can't explain! watever!

nevermind.yesterday morning.meesha came to my house.i invited her.so yea, we were all talking in the room. chrys,derek,meesha, and i.after that, we went to basketketball. we were too early. it's the last game for prima so we have to watch and it's the last time for me to go there. do you all know why? no? why not? . heehee :) cuz were leaving on saturday :'((((((( waaaa! i'm gonna cry ya! lets not talk about it.so yea, i heard so much news! JAMI and MARIAH is GOING OUT! i was shocked, but then happy for JAMI! right? haha. they think im jealous, waa! please. no yea!jyle told me they started going out on the 23rd of May. It was when they celebrated jyle's birthday.haayyy!Anyway, jyle texted me and gave me load as well. hahahahaaha =]then after that,we went out the court. it's really getting boring.meesha went playing badminton with jami and them.me,chrys,ate aprille,john, and derek were outside. whoaa! i broke my slippers mann! this was the 3rd time i broke my slippers this year! im not really embarassed not like what happened in the philippines. very much embarassing! aw.memories :(((( ! i feel sad now. i'm listening to IT'S NOT OVER by secondhand serenade. it's dedicated to matt! :((((let's go back to the topic.i hurriedly told my mom that my sandals broke, so she brought one slippers for me. after half an hour, patricia texted me. she wants us to go to 212. so i told my mom,meesha,and derek.i told her were on our way. my mom dropped by too.meesha wanted to go already, but im still havig fun. so i asked my mom if she could drop her to her house and at the same time pick chrys up.

at pat's room, there's thing happening.i was ignoring derek for not being sure that my phone is not lost. it maybe be childish for me to do that, but come'on, i don't want to happen to me what happened to micah. pretending that her phone is not missing and just misplaced it. aghh.so yea, we stayed at her room for 2-3 hours or more. pat and derek are having their moments while me and bea are just listening to musics.it was great. im having fun on my last week :((( why is this happening yea! chrys and derek made me realize that i should go out the house and have fun with them. yea watever! okaay.fine. i am!me and bea were talking about engsoon, she told me a story about when engsoon's friend was teasing engsoon by saying, "YOU LAIKIM" heehee :) if you guyz get it. good for you. haha. it made me smile. nakkss.i really miss engsoon.i texted him to call me, but he doesn't have load.so yea, after that. we went back to bea's house. it was 7 or 8 pm already. they called us. we had dinner at their house.chrys and i was playing the dance revo. then after playing that they played wii,while i was exploring bea's flashdrive.aw:(so much memories, and funny videos. haha. i was looking at the wrestling videos of me,micah and bea. so niceee and hilarious! then i asked bea if i could borrow her USB. she let me, but with a favor. i should go to school.mann! they're all forcing me.so i'm going. but in one condition, pat should also come too. then pat has one condition as well, i i mean two. first, i'll ask pat's parents if they could let her go, second,someone should pick her up and drop her off.the parents said yes, yey! haha.thank me.so yea, chrys got the installer of itunes. we have itunes now! my gooddnneesss! why is this all happening on my last week. things are rushed in coming. :((so yea, we went home at 9 going 10pm.i asked derek if he could let me borrow his phone for a night. it's with me.there's a message in the drafts which is about...and message from steesh which is also about...grrr.then we dropped him off. i slept at 2am, i was using the computer.listen to Savin' me by nickelback.it's dedicated to.....and the one i told you guyz to listen.the one dedicated to matt.well if only you have time.thanks. i know this is so LONG! but it's not necessary you read it all. haha. i'm just really in the mood of blogging.
oh wait i forgot to tell you about this misterious guy, they said he's name is DYLAN! but were not yet sure.

yesterday night.

2009-05-29T20:14:00.000-07:00

yesterday is like a slight great and sad day. i guess, and i don't see what's my point why it's a great day. anyway.
this is a lyrics of CRUSH- David Archuleta

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
Deep inside it was a rush, what a rush?
Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way
About me, just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized,
so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do??
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl?
Are we just friends?
Is there more?
Is there more?
See it's a chance we've gotta take?
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever!

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we could be, where this thing could go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do??
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we could be, where this thing could go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do??
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain?t going away-ay-ay
This crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away Going away-ay-ay Going away-ay-ay

*okaay.this song is exxage.it's not really about that. heehee :]

it's really relates to what happened yesterday. ok. this is so obvious that were talking about someone.Yesterday night, we went to yacht club. chrys wasn't with us, so it's only me and my mom. When we went in, Meesha came to me, she asked me if we could take a walk and just talk. Then we went to the farthest table of Yacht Club, it's a dark place. trust me. She was like hell, gossiping about too much things! i just have to get along of what she says. Mann! I love being with a gossiper! that talks get fun!haha, after half and hour, we went back to my mom to eat, but then there was no more space for me to eat! damn!So I asked meesha, if she could get my food, then I'd get the other meal stuff. After that, we went back to the farthest table already, then I asked her if she could get me a drink and tomato sauce. But don't worry, I'm not treating her as a slave, it's a favor, i payed her back anyway. She kept all the changes. So yea, there's this group of boys who came beside us, I mean beside the table. They were like talking shit. They're all from Coronation.So yea, I was listening to Meesha's Songs on her cellphone. They were so noisy that's why, Meesha and I talked who looks cute among all. Then She said, ****[ the one from LCA ] . I don't find him cute, I find the other one cute. the one wearing white long sleeves. DAmn, he's so cute! SO yea, we were chitchatting.bla.bla.

after half an hour again.i guess.
the one wearing White, long sleeves came to us. asking for my number. fck! i didn't know what to do. i was blushing for no reason! mann! what's wrong with me!?
Here's the conversation:
Misterious guy: Hey.
Meesha was staring at her, while I pretend to ignore him.Meesha made a look asking what.
Misterious guy: Can I get your number?
he was looking at me. for real.
Meesha: Khim, give yours.
Me: Sorry, no cellphone.
Misterious guy: but i just saw you holding a cellphone.
Me: I stole that phone!
Misterious guy: Bullshitt! [ in a funny way ]
It's the time when i stared at him already. hoping that i won't smile or blush.
Misterious guy: Please, I won't bug you or even talk to you. I just need you number.
Me: Then what's the point of you getting my number?*please tell me you like me.heehee :) kidding.
Misterious: [ disappointed CUTE face] aw
Fck.I was wishing that he won't leave yet.
Misterious guy: fine, house number?
then we ignored him.he left ='(
*i was planning to say, no house ya!

it's a BULLSH*T! i want to give it, it's his fault, he just couldn't wait! doesn't he know he's so cute! I didn't even get to know his name! ='( After that, Meesha said, he was staring at me, for the whole time. Wahahahaah! I didn't know what to do. I was just acting as if i didn't care. We were like pretending to talk about other people, but we were talking about him silently! Here's this thing, A sad thing, Everytime I'm about to leave, there's always someone who would be there to make me stay. it's just sad to know, it happened to me in my past. it hurt me alot. it feels like i so totally forgot about ****.Seems like he forgot me as well. he moved on already.I took him out of my feat.friend in fs = '(Aw. Why do i feel this way! saddddddd ='(

I just wanna know his name! I swear! I wanna know his number, his facebook,if ever. I just, LIKE HIM!i really don't believe in love at first sight, but yea! it sure happened to me already. he's all i think about now!like how do i get his number, his facebook. i just wanna know him before i leave! ='(

let's go back to the topic. After that,i forgot. haha.kidding.um, meesha left the table. coz' she was like leaving.I told her not to leave yet! so i was alone.He was about to come, but i decided to leave! eff me!then he shouted, hey! your number? then i ignored him.why the hell do i have to leave?! im so regreting!it's all my fault! someone slap me please!I should have the best night. aw.all i know is he mesmerized me!please! i should stop talking about him already.

Meesha and I decided that she'll come to my house on sunday. then i go to LCA on Monday.I was sitting alone somewhere by myself. just thinking about him. wondering if he will find me, wondering if i didn't leave, will he come talk to me one on one. I'm really regreting. it's all my fault! kill me!So yea, there's this man, from PNG, who sung I'm Yours by Jason Maraz. His voice is so cute! i love it. it looks like he was singing for me. coz' his staring at me. nakks!no really.ask him. haha. so anyway, i called patricia, i asked her if we can go out today. then i told her the story about this misterios guy! heehee :Dsorry. im so obsessed now. haha.

then..neeehh.this is so long already! people might complain! haha :) .i'm just in a mood of telling stories! no one in this house dared to listen at my stories that's why. haha. tnx for reading =]
oops.i forgot to tell you guyz that the group of boys were all australian. haaha.still obssessed.

new life =(

2009-05-28T23:23:00.000-07:00

i want a NEW life.
okay. i've been thinking alot of the positive and negative things after summer.
POSITIVE THINGS:
`i get to bring back my social life.
`i'd experience alot more miseries and happyness.if ever.
NEGATIVE THINGS:
`i'd get to see him, but there's a big possibility that everything would just end for the both of us =(
i mean, yes we would see each other, but what if he wouldn't mind bringing back the past anymore?, what if he finally moved on? i'd be hurt.still stranded.
`being independent.being with the jerks.no parents.no one supporting me. no love at home!
`living as a servant to myself.
`having early curfew, being stressed coz' of the time!
`budgeting the budgets.

okay.if i sort out all my future problems or let's say, next2 week, i'd die thinking of them.as you can all notice, there are alot more negative things than the positive ones. i don't know. i dont wanna stay longer here coz' my social life here, is LOW! but living at my own house, with my family, is just effin great! i love it, but at the same time, i'm not happy enough. my friends are all I would be living the love of my home, andgone, and they're all in the philippines.
I honestly wanna go back to the Philippines already, but at the same time no. going to a misery place.I treat my friends there as my family. the saddest time of my life there is going home.
I mean, you guyz won't really get me, unless i explain what's up with the house i'm living at. i'll just say it's HORRIBLE!i mean, horrible!

status of my future life: rebellious at the same time QUIET!

*i hope that there would be no day that i will be holding grudges to people.i want a new life. i want new people surrounding me. new names, new issues, just a LIFE i can call!

LCA vs. CORONATION

2009-05-27T01:36:00.000-07:00

i really have no time to tell all that happened to me today. i'll just make a summary.
chrys and i went to coronation to watch the basketball game of LCA versing the CORONATION. so yea, the junior girls of LCA lost they only got 2pts, while the coro got 6 pts. the junior boys of LCA won, i forgot how many point they have, so the coro lost. the on the seniors, the CORO BOYS and GIRLS won. anyway, today, were going to Lae Inter for dinner. I don't know wat's up with that, but yea, got to go.

things.

2009-05-25T01:06:00.000-07:00

ghhhhhhhaaaaasssh!hey all.

when was the last time i blogged again? hmm? haaha.anyway.next week is our flight to the philippines. should i feel happy or sad? .waa! i don't want to think about it.i hope days gets slower.last saturday.in the morning, chrys and i went to prima to use the internet. we stayed there for four hours only,coz we had to go to church.after church, derek came with us to jyle's birthday. i didn't want to go, but i'll be bored at home.at jyles birthday, i gave him his present. he's so cute! haha.then we stayed at his room until 10 pm. it was fun? .i guess.there's this private thing about *****. i can't tell. yea cuz this is public.my mom told us to go home coz' she's at tita michelle's house partying.waa! so we went home, so boring mann. then we watched,one missed call. it's not scary.

sunday.we derek,chrys,i. went to golf club with tito wen. i love the place. haha. it was fun. here's some pictures.after that. chrys and derek went to jami's house for independence practice, they wanted me to go,but i'm kinda tired and kris allen was performing at that time. you know,on tv. haha.i watched the american idol for a billion times. i promised them i'll go to the basketball, but i got lazy too. i just slept.just look at the pictures on my fb and fs.

today.

wooot. this afternoon, we went to air niugini watever. my rebooked our flight to POM. It will be on june 5,afternoon. hayy. after that,we went to able. we bought two flashdrives. for chrys and i. yey! haha.the last one was broken. heehee :D

anyway.did i tell you guyz about my house almost got in fire.look at the pics.not really the house, the bathroom. lucky chrys saw it.

kris.kris.kris.

2009-05-22T01:48:00.000-07:00

ohmyygggaaaa! kris allen won! woohhooooo! he's really cute. i also want adam lambert to win, but more on kris. haha. i was in both sides.yesterday night. we made a bet who will win, at first i was at adam's side, but then i went kris's side. haha! i looooovvvvvvvveeeeeee KRIS ALLEN!

anyway. nothing's really up,as usual. i'm having problem with sleeping. my insomnia is back! i mean. i forgot how to sleep,weird eii? .but yea. it's true. i really couldn't sleep. i even asked my mom if i can take a sleeping peels? .and she was like. NO! just drink milk,read books, or count sheeps. but all of them didn't work! grrrrr! i hate it!
so yea. i ruined my fs. i don't know how it happened but yea. i'm not in the mood of using friendster anymore. it's lame. i was really lazy using friendster yesterday. i didn't even comment back to the people who gave me comments, all i did was to view the bulletin, and answer those questions. haha. i wsa really bored!
i was chatting with danica yesterday, we were talking about school and people. she said school starts on june 2. and my daughter rea said it starts on june 8. i'm just really worrying that i might miss the election. i still want to be a secretary, even though my writing sucks. i don't care. i just asked her a favor that, if ever she's my classmate, she should count my name in. haha. my sister and i were talking about extending our flight to june 11. coz' were planning to go to madang on june 6. i didn't want to agree, but yea, i still wanna spend more time with my mom. it's gonna be a long time again. but it's not yet sure.

okay. i was watching UMAGANG KAY GANDA, about the horoscope. and in leo, it said that,you would still have your love one who is faraway from you back. it's something like that. ohhhmyygggaa! it relates alot to US! ahaahahahaha. don't know what else to blog. gotta stop hiaaa!

eeeiiiiaaaa..

2009-05-21T01:20:00.000-07:00

nothing much to blog.anyway.everyone kept on saying that school starts on june 2. but my auntie says it's on june 8. i don't know. im really confused.some says it's on june 3. what's wrong with people! .geeeeeeeezzzz..

one last night.

2009-05-20T00:28:00.000-07:00

krizia and I =.=

kuya ricky,me,chrys,krizia,and derekk :)

chrys.me.derek.krizia.and kuya roy.ughh

krizia.playing badminton.whoohhoo!

those are the pictures.done! haha.krizia's in philippines now.so sad.but it's okayy.haha.we had so much fun.

past.

2009-05-15T22:16:00.000-07:00

Me,holly,and danica =)

steph,danica,and I.

holly,me,aly,jam,and danica at the top.

my four sisters.awwww.damn.miss them alot =(

astig ba? .haha.look at the anklet.instead of the converse.

correction.

2009-05-15T21:04:00.001-07:00

okaayy.correction.i didn't blog only for a day.i'm really crazy.if you guyz didn't get what i said,just read my previous blog.

aha.

2009-05-15T20:55:00.000-07:00

after days of not blogging because of lazyness.

it's alright.haha.
im along here at prima.they're all gone.haha.im having more fun! yupp.internet all by myself for hours.this is how i like it.yea.baby. ok.i should stop saying that.
haha.hmpp.do you guyz know i drank coke for teh very first time after months. this lunch, i drank.i was thinking twice if i should breaky my record of not drinking sodas. but it's really hor and i have to cool myself off.haha

anyway.im joining multiply account now.i have to fix my profile yet.so, i'll be right back.

happenings..

2009-05-14T00:22:00.000-07:00

this happened yesterday but posted today...

so yea. ever since last night my sister was forcing me to go to school. i really didn't want to but yea, we went to school.
i was eating with bea and manisha. after lunch, the "asian crew",bea and manisha went back to their classrooms.
so it was only me,steesh,and chrys. it was boring at first.but yea.
we were talking. steesh was like being kinda kind to me.
we were talking about engsoon,and albert. albert liked me before, but after i left,she went out with albert.then.she went out with engsoon. she said it was funny. she goes out with the poeple who used to like me.
i thought of that, and i just smiled. it is so true. i just realized that. hmpp. i didn't get to say anything, i was a bit shy. all i can say to my dearest friends, -micah,nicole,and bea- ummm. i think we judeged the person already without knowing who she really is. she might be perverted in some ways,infact alot of ways,but she is a kind bitch. and i get along with her. sooorryy steesh, but what i said is a compliment :D

yuppp.the first one is with steesh.
the second picture is at 212.with pat and bea..

after an hour, it was grade eight's p.e[sports].
they asked me to join them, and i said sure,sure. we played basketball, and i really missed playing with them. too bad i wasn't wearing my highcut. damn. i would even enjoy playing alot more. i had to stop coz it's getting really hot.the heat kills.it really burns. i miss my old school.

patricia texted derek that i should call her. so i called her right away, i asked her why, then she said she can't come anymore. but me and bea planned that after school, we'll go to 212 to see her.

after that.we went to 212. haha. we talked alot of things and i can't write them all down here. it's really fun talking to patricia. we are now close, i guess. haha. she was also excited to be back in the philippines, but at the same time no, she has a reason why. a very awful reason.lols
we have the same flight, i guess,i alread told you that.haha
then after some hours, jeffrey came from school. we asked him who won from LAE CHRISTIAN ACADEMY vs. CORONATION in basketball. he said the boys won and the girls lost. whooo! great.hheehhee...
so yea,i was being crazy and asking lots of things..and blablablabla..
i stayed there until 8pm. it was fun after all. and tomorrow,we planned to see at school again.and lot more.haha.

dearest readers.you have every right to complain if my blog is long for you all to read.

happy saturday?

2009-05-08T22:17:00.000-07:00

as you can all see,there's a picture of a cellphone there.it's k770i. i'm having it soon and i can't wait for that soon.haha.my dad will be giving us.yey! haha.i promise that i won't loose this phone this time. that's gonna be my 8th phone. There's lots of reasons why i am promising to take care of this phone.cuz i always make my cellphones lost or giving it away. watever.
so yea.when is mother's day? dunno. hmpp.it's saturday again.the days are really getting fast.what happened with the world!? ahah.

not again.

2009-05-08T01:19:00.000-07:00

not again? what the? hmp.[he] gave me a comment that means goodbye. what the? why is this happening? it keep hurting me over and over again. i saw alot of his friend's profile, and he's the featured. waaa.im still jealous. but i can't be. awww.i thought im being over him!? i just really can't. i want the day to come that we'll face each other and talk things out. Hope that day comes. im sad.sad.sad.

minsweeper.yey!

2009-05-07T01:14:00.000-07:00

it may be easy for some of you.but come'on. it's my first time to win this game, and i didn't expect it.so let me be happy.ahahaha!

:D

2009-05-07T00:57:00.000-07:00

this was written yesterday and posted today.sorry.

this morning.i woke up and didn't notice that my mom was home. i went down, she asked me if i want to go the parlor.I said sure,sure. after dressing up,we left the house. in the parlor, my mom said i could test the curl style if it look good on me. and if it does, will be back before we leave. so yea, af you all saw he pictures,that's not what i meant as curl.i wanted it to be at the bottom and not really big curl. so yea, i took lots of pictures and got tired.i washed my hair already, and it was back to normal. there's a feeling of me of not being sure to curling my hair next time, cuz i might regret big.hayyss.

my wish?will it be granted?

2009-05-06T00:55:00.000-07:00

my curled hair.this morning,we went to the parlor.my mom said,i should test my hair into curling first, before i regret.and DONE! that's not yet it. haha.weirdd.i'll blog tomorrow.i'm kinda busy editing pictures :D

flashdrive!

2009-05-04T01:10:00.000-07:00

last night i slept really late.i don't know what time it is,but i know it's already late.haha.maybe 3am.i couldn't sleep.i thought my insomnia is back.wooohh.this morning.chrys woke me up annoyingly. she told me that mom will pick me up and she wouldn't tell why. so i was damn annoyed! i hate waking up early.it was 10am.after 3mins,my mom came.i was in the shower. luckily,i didn't wet my hair yet, cuz if i did,i'll take too long. I just bathe, without wetting my hair. then brushed my teeth,and got dressed. i was still so sleepy. i hate it! so i went out with my mom, without eating at all.we went out for shopping.i love shopping..haha.the first thing i looked for is drumstick. im buying one for my beloved cousin,jao. he said he wants drumsticks. so i found this drumstick, there was no other colors,except for brown.it's cheap. i always convert. so yea.i bought wallets coz it's all cheap.i love it! and the last one i bought is flashdrive.yey! haha.i have a new flash drive.lurrvvvee it!

wooohhhttt..

2009-05-04T00:50:00.000-07:00

this are pictures at tito al's birthday.i meant outside his house.lolx.with renso,chrys,and jeffrey.haha.laughters!:D

3 days of not blogging.
1/5/09

let's talk the things before last night came. which is yesterday afternoon. 3.30. we dropped chrys to 212. it really is a miracle that she chose going to 212 than using internet! im really lucky. my mom just dropped by to say hi to tita janet and tito doy. after that we left. i really dont wanna stay there. i dont feel comfortable.i was rushing my mom if we could go to prima already.
At prima.i was using my mom's internet.i love the computer there. it's really flat and wide.it's great! but then i couldn't do things coz she was around.i missed using mozilla firefox, cuz the one i use at home and tito wen's computer is windows explorer.but anyway.no sign of him.i don't care! it's good when he doesn't exist for awhile. it makes me forget about my heart problems.yes! for once! well.it's really not easy saying this words. but if this would help me be over him, i'd say it. even if my heart doesn't agree. i'm just into being over him right now. i took him out of my featured friend,i changed my layout,my previous layout was about him,i ignore him at ym, i changed the "GONE CRAZY" name in fs back to my old happy name. and i did it hardly. i didn't wanna do it. but if i kept on putting our name together even though the love is fading it would leave me a total pain. Now, I'm doing what's right. maybe this is what the destiny wanted to happen. i still believe that everything that happens has reasons.ayt? so, why did the topic turned out to him? let's go back.i only used the net for an hour,i guess. we picked up my sister, and had to stay at 212 for half an hour.i talked to patricia and bea.i haven't seen bea for two weeks.im happy that she's doing great. patricia? we are friends now. we have the same flight,yey! i get to talk with someone on the plane. were both waiting for our flight. but me? im not anymore, i don't wanna leave yet. i still wanna spend my time with my mom. i wont be seeing her again til' it's october.=( so yea.patricia had five boyfriends. and i'm sure her fifth one is the worst.haha.kidding.do you guyz know who her fifth boyfriend is? bleehhh..
at night.we had dinner at lae inter.and it's the first time i saw tito wen's daughter. she's gorgeous. she's only 11 years old, turning grade 6. she looks like this kid,celine lim? the one who plays the part of Kim Chiu when she was a kid all the time in tv shows. she's smart.here.pictures of the dinner.

2/5/09

night.
this night is like the best thing that ever happened to me, when i started moving on. tonight,tito al celebrated his birthday. i think, this is the worst birthday for him.i meant,not really worst.it's just that, it's kinda suckish. his last birthday celebration are really elagant. well.not really elegant,but that fun would always be there. i expected alot of drunk people, and people partying til dawn,but it didn't really work out like that. since he's the president, lots of visitors should have come. but there's only few who came. we heard that there are other party, maybe some of them went there. i just feel bad for him. im sure he expected FUN! so anyway. i was hanging out with Kuya Charlie. we took so much pictures. if you are noticing, that wine on my hands. i didn't really wanna drink,but i have too. i meant, i do wanna drink it. he's influencing me to drink it which is just wrong?! i would love to drink with my girl friends. im so totally growing up..after that.they left. i hanged out with renso. man.he's really funny! he made me laugh alot.oh.if you guyz are wondering who renso is, he was ummm.my bestfriend,classmate, and my bandmate before. i'm really great we got to talk alot. all we talked about is the past. the sleepovers, the lame band, and alot more. he left his cap with us.haha. i wish they'd be here again. so yea. jeffrey was also there.he gave me his bracelet.it stinks but i love it! he's a great friend though. all we talked about is engsoon. he said that engsoon really loves me, haha. and topic about engsoon and steesh.but i dont care.i invited them to come over sometime.coz really,i had fun! i didn't expect that.
before the night.which is in the morning.
i woke up at 10.coz' i slept at 2am. my mom was home already,and we were still sleeping. at least. we ate lunch, then went to prima to use internet.i edited lots of pictures,and also my layout in friendster. my previous layout was about him, and the layout i made is also about him. hmpp. it's about me being over him.even though i'm not.hayyss.4pm. after 4 hours of internet we went home to get dress for Church. i hate it, i really wanted to attend mass tomorrow,sunday. don't they know that i'm also a server to that church? i feel sad that bea's alone doing those things. next time, i'll attend mass there. i want to be sacristan.after that. we went home.

daet updatons.LIVE!

>i heard that there's a heavy rain. how sad. sam[ my? umm ] i don't know, she told me,she couldn't even go out and have fun or play tennis this summer cuz of rain. she also said that summer will be over soon,and yet, she still can't do what she planned to do.TENNIS!

>my couzin jao, he's asking me to look for a drumstick and buy for him. i would love to buy him, but where the hell can i find a drumstick here!?i'll be searching next week. i have lots of plans after two week.were gonna be leaving soon, which is sad. i'm gonna go shopping buy school supplies,pasalubongs,and others. i also have to go parlor. i'm planning to curl my hair,but not the whole hair,only at the bottom. it would be my 2nd year hairstyle. it's gonna be perfect.i have so much plans! but before those,i have to plan when my friends will come over.i'm really dying to talk to them. specially to renso, he's damn funny! haha. but hold on.gotta find a drumstick for my beloved couzin.

pictures from last night.

2009-05-01T20:44:00.000-07:00

i can't blog right now.i'll just upload a picture.Maybe sometime,i'll blog what happened last night.

tHe DiNNeR =]

yesterday and today.

2009-04-30T23:12:00.001-07:00

What I wrote from the previous blog was written before.I just got lazy putting it.so.

so.that's it.it's over.at least, i proved to him that i love him,even at the very last moment. i lost my pride! but yea, i took this too seriously. next time, i'll play up again. for revenge. kidding. the word REVENGE doesn't connect with LOVE. this heartbroken of mine is just a common problem every past relationship had. i meant, com'on. i shouldn't think that i only have a problem. so, acceptance part was over, it's getting OVER part now.right? yea. i think it's about time. what happened to the "i'll wait for you" part? guess i can't put the blame on him. this are all part of love. cuz i truly love him, and that will always remain.

today is friday and it's the first of may. i feel sad coz we only have one month and a week to stay with my mom. i promise to spend my time with my mom. i'll cry if we leave, at this moment, i don't have anyone there[philippines],except for my friends. waaa.my first month there will be sad. no parents. but it's ok.independent again. my dad will come after a month, which is on july.to stay with us for a month, and at the same time, he'll be there for chrys's birthday. how lucky.

this past few days, have been strange. it's kinda private, but it's about my uncle. i can't tell about it,specially in PUBLIC! they don't even talk it out in public here, what more in a public site? i'll just shut up and stop sayin the word public.. it's not that worst anyway.
so, on sunday, sol will come over. she'll come with me to the basketball. yey! i'm with someone. i haven't really been going out this past few days. it's part of my depression.haha.but it's over. honestly, this depression thing taught me that i should love staying at home. now, i'll be back to being me. haha.watever.

last 3 days, i forgot to tell you people, that i called my dearest friends back in the Philippines. Alyssa and Danica. I was ringing my bestfriend Ulyza, but she wouldn't answer the phone. I don't know why. But yea, I talked a little longer to Alyssa than Danica. All we talked about is HIM. I called them coz' im lonely. Speaking to them makes me happy..Alyssa asked me why i did that to him? i told her the usual thing i say..then she asked if i still love him, i said ofcourse. what i did is just temporary thing.and it's for the best. but then, it turned out permanently and worst! i didn't know that. I was full of regretion, and it's too late for apologies. i lost him. i ended the conversation fast. i really wanted to call ulyza, i miss her alot.she didn't answer me. i am her bestfriend, and i was the last one to know that paul and her broke up! that's just a crap, i didn't know. sorry, i'm too far away, and i'm so not being updated to people's life anymore.so sad.

The other night, i texted engsoon.he's in malaysia. he was my MU before. he told me last time everything he felt about me.and it's just awesome to hear. but, it's too late. watever happens, we will remain the "KIMSOON" , "KIMLIM" ,or the "LIMBANO" name stands just for the both of us. I told him,that i was sad,and he asked why. i was too lazy to say why, cuz i've been telling alot of my friends, why i'm sad. i think he was the last person to know. i'm happy that i can still connect with my past love.haha.i wonder how he is.*wondering.hope he's here..then.then..i told him to never go back here, coz it's boring, and i think there's no reason for him to go back here cuz i'll be gone. haha.no shame? .lols . he'll be back here on december.it's the time of their summer..i really miss him! im revealing alot here. i'm gonna private this when i get back to the philippines. but for now, i'll put this account in public. i just want my friends to be updated with my life.

Today.we went out for lunch.and i was really fool, until now. i ate this big burger,which is totally yummy.haha.here are some pictures:)

randomness..

2009-04-30T23:01:00.000-07:00

"im fine.at least, even at the very last moment, i proved to him that i love him..." -UNKNOWN

april 29.

"Most of my classmates tell me that I'm so mataray.I've looked in the mirror and thought,"Do I look like a bully?" My friends say it's 'cause of the way I look.Any advice? -Yjasmin

"I had my most embarassing moment at school when my friend and I were hungry and we decided to go out and buy food. When we were on our way out,my friend pushed me.My crush was there and I actually screamed out into the ear of my crush-infront of everybody.He even said"Ouch!"So embarassing!"-Grace

Those are the words I read in TotalGirl Mag.Well the first one,is relating to me.Haha.My friends knows about that. People's first impression to me is Mataray, even my Computer teacher did call me that.
and It's because of my eyes, I use to raise my right eyebrow. But now I stopped.lolx.What? Im a good girl now huh? .The second one is not really about my crush, see, I wanted to call my bestfriend ULYZA, I didn't wanna go near her cuz im lazy to walk,so I just decided to scream it out loud. So I said,"ULYZA!!", right at my Filipino Teachers ear. I was like, Im sorry,im sorry,im sorry. But I didn't get in trouble. She just said "Miss Urbano, alam mo ba na malapit ka sa faculty room," so yea.When she left,instead of getting embarassed, I laughed so hard.lol.lol.lol.Oh.Memories.
Anyway.I read this Motto I guess, Like If you want something,but didn't plan a goal,then that's a wish. I don't know.Im too lazy to search for the right words...LAZYNESS is attacking me!

------------

april 27.

im jealous?
no! i shouldn't be.it's just wrong.Why should I? they're just close friends. Friends who dedicates loves songs to each other! it's just unfair for me! Maybe People's right.I don't deserve him, and he doesn't deserve me as well. Why the hell am I saying this. Of course, He's not my anything and He will never be. There will be no more chance coz I missed it already! I don't deserve him. He needs someone who will love him back the way he loves, he needs someone who would always be there for him. Who wouldn't hurt him, who would comfort him, and who would always make him happy. I can't blame him. He's handsome,he has a good personality, he doesn't deserve me! But I still can't face the fact that im jealous! :(

sad as usual.

2009-04-30T01:25:00.000-07:00

there are so much things i wanted to write.but then this thing had to stuck up.
Im really sad right now! waaaaaaaaa!! I can't take this anymore! im hurt again!
he doesn't love me anymore. is that it?! help me! death is after this! umm.hope not.but yea.
how come this happens to me? huhuhu:((
I told him that im taking back everything I said, which just looks awful for me to say. but yea.As nicole said, If i really love him, i'll take back what I said. But then, it's too late! too late for apologies! I'm damn sad! I hate it! You guyz should listen to "kung alam mo lang" by Roxanne Barcelo. that song is for him!

err.

2009-04-30T01:18:00.000-07:00

Im pissed right now.Cuz of this stupid blog! I can't tell you! I wrote so much things already,and it had to stack up! damn! and now,im lazy too write!hah!

OMG!

2009-04-28T02:58:00.000-07:00

omg.i took this thing on facebook about who I will marry. I mean. What letter the name would start. and it was M. I wanted to copy the details about it, but this stupid windows closed.but yea.it's really nice.hmp.wonder who could that be? lols. anyway.this is a picture of James Blanco.Swear! he has the killer look! mann.he's awesome!

oops.

2009-04-28T01:00:00.000-07:00

sorry about the last blog I made.so yea.tomorrow is tito al's birthday,but he's celebrating it on Saturday. IT's gonna be a big party, you know he's the LFA PRESIDENT! and he's last party are really great. so i am expecting alot.
Btw,Did you guyz know James Blanco? .wait.I don't know if that's his name.but yea.He's really handsome. and he has a killer look.damn! He reminds me of someone.Way back from the past.awww.Okay fine. This is about me and my friends. We met this dood, from another school. I forgot the name of the school, but yea,they visited our school,for parade. and he's really cute. mostly all my friends likes him. It was really funny. But his past,isn't that nice.So let's go back to the topic, mann.James is really cute. My sister and I just noticed that, when we watched MMK in TFC. I wanna watch it again! it's the best.

Wait.Imma stop blogging.so much things to do here.I need to help edit this blog.Be back.

damn.

2009-04-28T00:46:00.000-07:00

YM is really pissing me off! damn.i wonder how stupid it can ever be! It's really hard to login! shiit.hmp.anyway.nothing's up.i'm just gonna make the, "I HOPE THIS THINGS IM TELLING YOU IS INTERESTING! " blog.

I woke up this morning really late. It's like 12.20pm already. My mom and her friends were there. I was still so sleepy but then I have to wake up to eat lunch. I had a really bad dream. It's about my hair. It might not be so bad, but for me,it is. My hair went really big, and not straight anymore. I was really nervous in my dream. I combed my hair, lucky it was just a dream! I love my hair, If you guyz doesn't know.

Chrys will be editing my blog, so the credits goes to her. haha.hmp.So what's next?
This Afternoon, It's boring! We had to stay at home, doing nothing. But we ate 2 ice creams.haha.
yumm. hhaha.Anyway.I might not have time to blog tomorrow so i'll make this in advance. HAPPY 43RD B-DAY T2 AL!

monday.

2009-04-27T02:22:00.000-07:00

yesterday night was really weird! I really can't tell you, but I should. Hm.I guess I shouldn't, but it's about my mom.Okay.I should stop already.Anyway, Im chatting with Joshua right now, I missed him so much.He grew thin he said it proudly and he had a girlfriend. So sad.Haha.The girl was um.malaysian.anyway.
"your absence from my immediate vicinity seems to affect a depression of sort within this realms of my day to day existence."- UNKNOWN
Those words aren't from me, I just received that message this morning and the number was SUN. Who could it be? hmp. I kept the number cuz that person will be the first one I will sms when I get back to Philippines. Im just curious.
I took this Which candy are you in facebook, and im the chocolate bar.haha.so true! FB is fun.

be back.

what will happen next?

2009-04-24T21:10:00.000-07:00

um.what do i write? nothing really happened from the last time I blogged.
Today is Saturday.I love my outfit today and yea. Nothing to blog. com'on!

I'll just write infos about Austin Butler.interesting ei?lols
Name
Austin Butler (Austin Robert Butler)
Age
17
Height
6' (183 cm)
Build
Slim
Hair Color
Blonde
Date of Birth
August 17, 1991
Birthplace
Anaheim, California, USA
Star Sign
Leo
Nationality
American
Ethnicity
White
Occupation
Actor
Celebrity Index
Au
Claim to Fame
The Faithful

Austin has always enjoyed movies of all types. When he was 13 he was walking around at the Orange County Fair and was approached by a representative from a background-acting management company, who helped him get started in the entertainment industry. He found that he really enjoyed it, and began taking a few acting classes. Soon, he landed a rather permanent (2005-2007) background-acting gig on Nickelodeon`s "Ned`s Declassified School Survival Guide" (2004), and a friend on the show, Lindsey Shaw, introduced him to her manager, who offered to represent him. From that point on, he considered himself to be a serious actor.His first named (albeit uncredited) character was "Toby" in the "Hannah Montana" (2006) episode "Oops, I Meddled Again" in 2006 (girl broke up with him). First speaking role was in "Zoey 101" (2005), as "Dannifer" or "Wrong Danny" (a few lines, and a girl poured soda down his shirt). He got a meatier role on "Hannah Montana" (2006) in 2007, still a small part, but very fun (a few more lines, and he got to fling popcorn on Miley Cyrus).His big break (relatively speaking) was in 2007, as casting directors started to recognize him from his many, many auditions, and he was given an opportunity to play the part of "Jake Krandle" in the new Nickelodeon series "iCarly" (2007), which should start airing late in 2007. His first episode is called "iLike Jake."

Biography Credit: www.imdb.com/name/nm2581521

that's it.I didn't read it yet.But, I want you guyz to be thi first one to read it.hahaha! Unless you're not interested.YOU SHOULD BE!

just NOTHING.

2009-04-24T01:30:00.000-07:00

ei.check out my plurk.Im learning how to make my own background.But my time isn't enough for learning right now. Maybe tomorrow.I need 24 hours internet time!
oh well.
I was chatting with nicole.haha.it was surprising we didn't talk about LOVE problem or about her Kuya Roger or even my thing. It was nice.haha, and I also chatted with Ate Isha.
She said like, it's nice that I don't have to focus on my love life anymore. Becuz my status was like "Move on?" Was I so bad, this is just me. When I have problems, I let the whole world know.
But anyway, I don't care. Im gonna focus on this plurk thing. It's really addictive!

So yea. Tomorrow.It's Saturday, and I don't have plans at all. I miss Philippines. But it's ok.
My mom said if I'd like to come tih her tomorrow, I think she's going to her friends house.
I'll just have to go, even if i'll be bored there. Not like, staying at home, thinking of so many things, and be depress. Actually, I love staying at home! I think it's more fun than going out this summer. OMG! can't believe I said that. But anyway, It really is, if you're in my situation.

I want to read so much things about horoscopes. Where do I find, newspapers? Its all about politic things and business, and in this UMAGANG KAY GANDA show , it's about family thing.
Hmp. I need magazines, that talks about horoscope. At home, My sister have this Total Girl magz collection. But it's all 2006-2007. It's all useless, unless I still believe. Im really crazy. Should I believe on that horoscope thing? .

Im planning to do something to this blog.But I'll see.
hekhek.no pics right now.It destroys this blog. I can't put it in order, which may be easy, But NVM those..You guyz should listen to this, "WORTH THE WAIT,"by Jordin Spark.It does relate to me.I never wanna hear "OVER YOU" by Daughtry, I just can't. It's not for me right now, and I don't want to sing that song. I would always love him.

More bloggings later or probably tomorrow.

depression.has to STOP!

2009-04-24T00:32:00.000-07:00

I searched the word depression in google and I found a story of this Lindsay, which is just very common to all the who got depressed out there.

Depression Is Common
Lately Lindsay hasn't felt like herself. Her friends have noticed it, too. Kia was surprised when Lindsay turned down her invitation to go to the mall last Saturday. There was really no reason not to go, but Lindsay just didn't feel like it. Instead, she spent most of Saturday sleeping.
Staying in more than usual isn't the only change in Lindsay. She's always been a really good student. But over the past couple of months her grades have fallen and she has trouble concentrating. She forgot to turn in a paper that was due and is having a hard time getting motivated to study for her finals.

Lindsay feels tired all the time but has difficulty falling asleep. She's gained weight too. When her mother asks her what's wrong, Lindsay just feels like crying. But she doesn't know why. Nothing particularly bad has happened. Yet Lindsay feels sad all the time and can't shake it.
Lindsay may not realize it yet, but she is depressed.
Depression is very common and affects as many as 1 in 8 people in their teen years. Depression affects people of every color, race, economic status, or age; however, it does seem to affect more girls than guys.
How Do People Respond to Someone Who's Depressed?
Sometimes friends or family members recognize that someone is depressed. They may respond with love, kindness, or support, hoping that the sadness will soon pass. They may offer to listen if the person wants to talk. If the depressed feeling doesn't pass with a little time, friends or loved ones may encourage the person to get help from a doctor, therapist, or counselor.
But not everyone recognizes depression when it happens to someone they know.
Some people don't really understand about depression. For example, they may react to a depressed person's low energy with criticism, yelling at the person for acting lazy or not trying harder. Some people mistakenly believe that depression is just an attitude or a mood that a person can shake off. It's not that easy.
Sometimes even people who are depressed don't take their condition seriously enough. Some people feel that they are weak in some way because they are depressed. This is wrong - and it can even be harmful if it causes people to hide their depression and avoid getting help.
Occasionally, when depression causes physical symptoms (things like headaches or other stress-related problems, a person may see a doctor. Once in a while, even a well-meaning doctor may not realize a person is depressed, and just treat the physical symptoms.

the end.

Indenial,anger,and acceptance are all part of love. Which I learned from Edwin in "Life with the Derek" show. From now on, Im not gonna think of him, and just let things happen.
Since this is the part of Acceptance already. What else can I do, right?

I'll be back.Oops. I couldn't put lot more things about this word LOVE. I wrote so many things, and it's all at home. No usb yet. Chrys broke it.damn her.be back.gotta do this plurk thing.

to all readers..

2009-04-23T01:57:00.000-07:00

To all readers who appreciate going to this site and reading my short and maybe useless stories, thank you for all the comments and advices you gave me in ym. I appreciate those. Just keep updating my SAD LIFE, for now, don't worry it wont be that bad. Haha, thanks again.

so much for LOVE..

2009-04-23T01:31:00.000-07:00

ok.there are so much things i have learn from LOVE. it has alot of thing in it. "LOVE is like a ROSARY that's full of MYSTERY." I list down all the things i learned from LOVE and it's at home. I realized so many things. Anyway. Micah and Nicole are like the one whp gives me advices about the problem I have ever since before! They said. Let Go. I really can't. Maybe I love him so much! which is just wrong, right?
Seriously, I had nothing with this guy, but it seems like he was mine.Can someone get me out of this problem! Im trap!

Anyway.I saw his shoutout. And there's a big meaning of it. I can't tell you. know why? cuz this is public! I have to private my blog already, before someone gossips. SHHH!!
Im really crazy now! But yea, This past 3 days, I haven't really been sending him msgs cuz and same to him. It's going fine for now. Not like the past few days, All I do is to lie down and watch, then sleep. My mom even called me CRAZY, cuz i guessed she noticed my NOT GOING OUT THE HOUSE to stroll with her, since its HOLIDAY! Not talking with him, helped me actually.maybe, I should really stop...I just really can't.

help me! im trapped!

2009-04-22T01:41:00.000-07:00

okaay.this place is useless! my friends back here are all gone.except for one.
and the other one which is John! I don't know why I kept talking to him! He doesn't comfort me,doesn't give good advices, he's useless! Im like crazy at home. I only eat,internet,then sleep.
I can't live my life anymore! Only one month and i'll be back to Philippines.

Anyway.Nicole's right! Im too stupid to say "Wag muna tau magcontact.mahihirapan lng tau" shit those words! it turned me into depression.sadness.not laughing or smiling.even socializing with others. What happened to me! oh no! I even chose staying at home, instead of going out with friends. Im regreting! i really am. I wanna take it back. But.pride? Nicole told me, "If you really love him, then take it back." Im confident that he'll still be there for me. But, I can't. I'll let the days past, and I'll see. If it makes my heart bleed alot more, then I'll take it back as soon as possible. I can't forget him.duh.of course I wont. Im crazy!

Be back.

hate summer :((

2009-04-22T01:17:00.000-07:00

wel.im suppose to be happy since im here with my mom! but i just cant.
it's all my stupid fault! i should have took it back as nicole told me.She's right.
Why does both of us always have problem with love. She soo right!
My sister told me a story of this two people in a relationship for 7 months. They promised that they would contact all the time. On the first week of Summer, they kept on calling and sending messages to each other. But then, the days past, they both had busy schedule and forgot to even greet each other. They were both confident they wouldn't loose each other. When days past, the love is fading... After Summer. At School. They were not comfortable of each other anymore and not as close as before anymore. So, they decided to break up. See! Summer ruined everything! right? it's just unfair for them!

Like A Knife- Secondhand Serenade

I did a lot, I know you sayI've got to get away.
"The world is not yours for the taking"Is all you ever say.
I know I'm not the best for you,But promise that you'll stay.
'Cause if I watch you go,You'll see me wasting, you'll see me wasting away

'Cause today, you walked out of my life
'Cause today, your words felt like a knifeI'm not living this life.

Goodbyes are meant for lonely people standing in the rainAnd no matter where I go it's always pouring all the same.These streets are filled with memoriesBoth good for detected painAnd all I wanna do is love youBut I'm the only one to blame.

'Cause today, you walked out of my life
'Cause today, your words felt like a knifeI'm not living this life.

But what do I know, if you're leavingAll you did was stop the bleeding.
But these scars will stay forever,These scars will stay foreverAnd these words have no meaning If we cannot find the feeling That we held on to togetherTry your hardest to remember

Stay with me,Or watch me bleed,I need you just to breathe.

'Cause today, you walked out of my life(stay with me, or watch me bleed)'Cause today, your words felt like a knife(i need you just to breathe.)I'm not living this life

,cuteness!

2009-04-17T21:44:00.000-07:00

AUSTIN ROBERT BUTLER :))

there's always space for getting hurt..

2009-04-15T00:27:00.000-07:00

i don't really like whats been happening this past few days. See, I don't feel like he still wanna work things out. Cuz, If he ever did, then he should be around doing something. If I ever hurt him, well sorry! actually, It's my fault,but I didn't mean to hurt him! I'm just thinking of what's best for the both of us. I mean, time can wait right? ummm.ryt!? well not really.then he should wait for me as he promised before I left...
I've been waiting for his messages but not even one showed up.This is just unfair for me! Im doing everything already, maybe apologizes aren't enough :c
DEAR U, IM SORRY!

well.I woke up this morning at 9. I was hoping he texted.but ya.he didn't. MAybe I'm expecting alot from him,right? .woow.Yesterday night, Im planning to text Engsoon, but the number Aj gave me was wrong. How is he?wondering..
Tomorrow, My friends are coming over for lunch. At least, it wonk make me a little sad.I still have them with me. Mostly are boys, and Bea.I invited them, and thats the best idea i ever had.When im depressed.This is the song for me right now. Forget about Me.I only like the Chorus.

Little Bit : Forget About Me Lyrics
Hmm Whoaaa Oohhh Yeahh
You said it wasn't Gonna be like It was before Then it happened again Pushing me back Out the door Thought it would be For real this time Love me forget About the signs So now what do I do Now, that I know That we're through

Wish that I Could move on Can't let go It's too strong Just like that And then you're gone Is this how You wanted it to be Everything you had to say Sent the tears Right down my face Now I'm trying to escape The misery

[Chorus:]
Why don't you love me The way I loved you It feels so crazy Cause I dont know What I did to you If you're gonna hurt me Then do it quickly Cause I'm tired of cryin' If you don't wanna Stick around Then, baby Forget about me

Too late, sorry I didn't even Have the chance You said you were happy Baby I don't understand Gave you everything You asked for And was ready To give you a lot more I would've given The world Right in the palm Of your hand

Wish that I Could move on Can't let go It's too strong Just like that And then you're gone Is this how You wanted it to be Everything you had to say Sent the tears Right down my face Now I'm trying to escape The misery

[Chorus]

Boy My heart was true And that you can't deny Don't be a fool And walk away From all the lies It's up to you Cause heaven knows I've tried Tell me You're still in love Yeahhhh Ohh

[Chorus]

Forget about me I really loved you...

tsk2.dedicated ean kay 16?

pictures...random.[easter week]

2009-04-14T01:07:00.000-07:00

ahem?

2009-04-14T00:52:00.000-07:00

Okaay.I found out the reason why he isn't texting.and yaar.too private.lolx.it's not my fault!I'm just thinking that we have to be sure of each other first, and were too faraway from each other. Were both ok?hope it doesn't last.I LOVE HIM!
he's mine.

murr bloggings...

easter sadness:((

2009-04-14T00:50:00.000-07:00

EASTER SADNESS :((

ahuhu.this past few days i really felt sad :(
we went to zenag for easter. We had an overnight to Uncle Bing's place.
It was cold, so i loved it there.So there's this thing that didn't make me happy at all, it's about matt.
I feel really sad and regreting? I thought we were fine to what we have.He asked me now if he could court me, I didn't wanna say yes, neither no. He said it was just a simple YES or NO. For me it's a big thing. Before I really had a big crush on him.I really wanted him to be mine, so we got closed, but its at the wrong time.
I thought long distance wouldn't be that hard, but i admit it, I don't think it worked out. urghh.this the most difficult emotion i ever had.well not really.but yea.huhuhu.emote? So yea.Im afraid that being committed with each other will ruin the relationship we have.But then, in my mind,why not try? nothing would change anyway.right?
I said, "BAKIT PA?/why for?""aren't we okay for what we have?",and he asked,
"SO HANGGANG DITO NALANG TALAGA?", I felt bad and said, "EWAN CU."
Honestly, I felt like taking it back.but oh well.I didn't wanna lose him.See, we kept on having an arguement this past few days, what more if were in a relationship? .Isn't this sad for me.ahuhu.I wanna enjoy my summer HAPPY! But instead, I kept on thinking of him.waaaaaa .WAKE ME UP!

Morning.
In the morning, I woke up, hoping he texted me. But he didn't.My morning is ruined if he doesn't text.Anyway, We woke up around 8. We had breakfast.woo.
I felt SUMMER.haha.it's cold! after that.we got ready to go to the the valley to see the falls.It's tiring, But it's fun! i'll put pictures sometime..then we went back for lunch and we got ready to go back to LAE.

At night.Micah and Father's farewell party.waaaa.I really felt sad.I dont know how to burst up my sadness.Music?No! Anyway.I said bye to Father Apol.And micah, I'll see her tomorrow.I'll visit her early in the morning.that's how desperate I am.lolx.I slept already to forget the sadness.

EASTER MONDAY.
Micah's house.Woo.We talked about so many things. I taught her everything about Philippines.well not really everything.Im happy for her that she'll stay in the Philippines.We'll get connected all the time. But of course, I'll be bored here, I didn't want her to leave yet. Anyway.I could only wish happiness for a friend.We planned to see on June, when I come back to Philippines, Maybe on July too, when my dad comes, October, when my mom comes, and my sister doing an entrance exam for College, and March,my mom comes again for my sister's graduation and leave for summer.Micah is the best friend I've ever met, She really makes me laugh, and comfort me in everyway.how dramatic.5pm.My mom picked me up, It was time to say goodbye.Ahuhu.I felt like crying, But i know i'll see her after months.waaaaaaaaaaaa.So I hugged her and we Beso-beso, and hugged again, and more!i know that were prolonging our agony,but this is how i say goodbye to VIP to me.I wish days past already!This is what i hate.Saying farewells! Why does this always happen to me? Im too weak for that!huhuhuhuhuhu.I'll forget this soon. Now I have no one to listen to me!

Comment me in my tagboard if you wanna comfort me.Advices?

me,myself,and i :))

2009-04-09T01:11:00.000-07:00

update with khimmy :))

2009-04-08T02:54:00.000-07:00

yey.finally.i have plurk.wanna join?
view my plurk.http://www.plurk.com/mhik
add me up on facebook as well.
kim_ann_urbano02@yahoo.com

surfing the net...

back here.

2009-04-08T01:38:00.000-07:00

so, I didn't go to frabelle,even though I knew she's [MICAH] leaving soon. There's no reason to worry, I can see her anytime in the Philippines? umm.or will we? I can't wait to be back in the Philippines, but it's sorta sad, I don't wanna leave this place, If I have to suffer there for one month without any parents. That's always the issue at home.urghh!

today.Why does derek have to inform me wherever he is? umm.I dont really care.Anyway.he was at Jaychen's house with Renso, and HE'S BROTHERS! i can't do anything, i mean, i'm with no one.Micah wasn't there, so wulang makapal ang muka. I can't od that alone.

~wanna see sum of my australia pictures, which i look ugly?okaayy.good.

that's it.I edited it,cuz it's so hard to put pictures here in order.anyway.

I've been staying at home with my sister cuz my mom's at her office.which is just sad, but if there' s something to do at home except eating,watching,internet,and sleeping, I won't be bored!

My mom even wants us to read books! ,oh come on.Its summer!

umm.this is just it.no new stories. It's HOLY WEEK. yea.dont go out too much.

continuation...:((

2009-04-07T01:15:00.000-07:00

f*cccckkkk!I have to repost again! .damn.Well.I was writing.and the windows just closed by itself and I swear I didn't do anything! grrrrrrr.....

in case something happens.Im gonna upload pictures now this thing is pissing me off.grrr

the first picture is the swimming and the 2nd badminton thing.and mii dancing the dance revo,which i forgot to rotate the picture.Then me and Bea.and the last one.three of us.woo

Yesterday Night. After swimming I went here in my mom's office.There was a chance for me to go online, thats why i came here.Anyway.Derek called me and told me If I could go to this badminton thing cuz the asian crue was there.and I was thinking like.so?? they wanted me there.awwww.haha.

but I couldn't go, I was too tired.but i had time to go online.haha.My eyes were very red and I couldn't stand talking for more.So I wanted to sleep. But micah called me crying.yaa.because she lost her cellphone.oh wait.did i tell you her phone was lost? umm.probably not.okaayy.and she was like bugging me..

When I was about to sleep, Derek texted me asking If he could come to my house today, But I said no.Coz really.Im tired! and he asked me one more thing, about this two brothers..But that's too private..

This morning.12pm

umm.how long did i sleep??i was really tired, and my eyes are still red.and ghad.Im too dark.ahuhu

anyway.its part of summer.ryt? haha.

I haven't really been texting with ttam this past few days.which is so sad :((

this is it.sorry.I forgot where I stopped from yesterday.but i hope pictures helped.

Randomness and Micah's farewell party :(

2009-04-06T01:08:00.000-07:00

SLEEPOVER.

I went to Bea's house right after i finished going online...
I played the dance revo right away and damn.it's fun.haha.I wanna upload a video of me dancing,but internet here is slow.so it suck..
The topic was always about John.harsh.

after hours..

Bea slept early. Micah and I stayed late.we slept at 4am and woke up at 8am.
and they were still sleeping.

In the morning.

Sol called and I was really annoyed.She invited us to her birthday.
we came at 10.we were earlier than her.it was funny.
We swam and stopped at 1pm to go to the basketball..

basketball...

I was kinda tired at that time but still, I played badminton.
after playing.We told everyone about the swimming plan for micah's farewell.and they all agreed about the plan.We had to leave for Church.

At night..

It was kuya roy's and kuya charlie's birthday.oh yea.HAPPY BIRTHDAY KUYA ROY! he's now 25 years old.awwww. and one murr.HAPPY BIRTHDAY KUYA CHARLIE..he's now done being a teenager coz he's 20 yrs ol.which is just sad.He told me he didn't sleep the other night to enjoy his last days of being a teenager.I even forgot to greet him when I saw him which made me feel bad. But anyway.I hugged him for not greeting him.
He was bored so I had to spend my whole night with him.I did that.Coz it's his birthday.

11pm.

John called me and asked every information about Micah's farewell party.and came up when we were both telling stories about the past.Why is he being him when he's on the phone and When he's infront of me.He just feel awkward.

Monday Morning :))

I woke up at 8.woo.Friends are tecting mii already.But I had to check my roaming first.haha.
Then micah called and told me she was coming.So I waited for her.

Melanesian.

They were all there.Me and Micah were the last one.
The pool was dirty so i got pissed.We ate pizza first and left for Lae Inter.We had to change location.The pool fee is still k20! But Be'as mom payed for everything.yey.
But then,we found out micah's cp was lost.Derek and I had to call the Melo,But they said it they'll find it,But it wasnt there.We had to lie to micah that they found it,so that the party will go on.But I felt really bad.

John and Aj left.
Ok.this marcopolo game went to "MicahJeffrey" game.yaa.I made that game.haha.
I only knew that Jyle is so cute.haha.Micah harrased him in a Micah way.haha.But I only hugged him.haha.he's so cute and chubby.Im his legal wife and micah is the kabet.sad for mii.but he loves me murr.haha.

to be continued...
(i'll update with the swimming pictures and the sleepover as well)

UPDATING :))

2009-04-03T21:04:00.000-07:00

I'm here at my mom's office.She'll drop me later to Bea's house coz I'm sleeping over.

this will be the first time that i will be sleeping over since i left..yey!

Micah and Bea are waiting for mii but I have to drop by and blog..

We just came from home.

Anyway.I'll just update you from the last LFA BASKETBALL.and i was the muse of YES LTD..

umm.the pictures are missing.haha.NVM about that..

i'll just put a picture of mii dancing the DANCE REVO at jaychen's house.

okaayy.my face isn't really shown.haha.im kinda drunk at that time.lol

haha.well.i act as if i am.according to how i dance :))

be back..

im just updating with lyf :))

2009-04-03T01:44:00.000-07:00

umm.instead of me being stuck at home and keep thinking of him, i've been going onlyn most of the times.haha.it would keep me busy and updated to life.lol
i've been staying at home this days around coz my mom's at work.uughh

well.visit this site for mii.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp32B1ueoys

yaar.ahaha.
if you can notice that i dont update this blog daily coz umm..im to busy and lazy as well.haha.lucky im not really doing anything now.
but just add mii up if y0o have facebook.
kim_ann_urbano02@yahoo.com

wat murr?? im happy dis summer.ugghhh.should i say that??
umm.not really.coz i've been thinking of HIM all the time.
when i wake up til i sleep.which is just crazy.haha

anyway.i'll update more soon.

currently: missing him :(

2009-03-27T01:31:00.000-07:00

NE-YO - Mad
Oooo oooo ooooOooo oooo
ummm.She's staring at me, I'm sitting wondering what she's thinkingUmmm Nobody's talking, cause' talking just turns into screaming (Oooo)And now yes I'm yelling over her, she yelling over me,all that that means is neither of us are listening,and what's even worse, that we don't even remember why we're fightingSo both of us are mad for nothing, (fighting for)nothing, (crying for)nothing, (oohh)When we won't let it go for nothing, (come back for)nothing,it should be nothingto a love like what we got oh babyI know some times it's gonna rain,But baby can we make up nowcause' I can't sleep through the pain (can't sleep through the pain)girl I don't want to go to bed, mad at youand I don't want you to go to bed, mad at meno I don't want to go to bed mad at youand I don't want you to go to bed, mad at me (oh noo)Ummand it gets me upset girl when you're constantly accusing(asking questions like you already know)hey we're fighting this war when both of us are losing(this ain't the way that love is supposed to go, whatever happened to working it out?)We fall into this place where you ain't backing down, and I ain't backing down,so what the hell do we do now?So both of us are mad for nothing, (fighting for)nothing, (crying for)nothing... (oohh)When we won't let it go for nothing,nothing,it should be nothingto a love like what we got oh babyI know some times it's gonna rain,But baby can we make up nowcause' I can't sleep through the pain (can't sleep through the pain)girl I don't want to go to bed mad at youand I don't want you to go to bed, mad at meno I don't want to go to bed mad at youand I don't want you to go to bed, mad at me (oh noo)Oh baby this love ain't gone be perfect, (perfect perfect oh no)And just how good it's gonna beWe can fuss and we can fight long as everything is alright between us before we go to sleep...Baby we're gonna be...Yah.... Baby....ohhhh....ohhhhI know some times it's gonna rain,But baby can we make up nowcause' I can't sleep through the pain (can't sleep through the pain)girl I don't want to go to bed mad at youand I don't want you to go to bed, mad at meno I don't want to go to bed mad at youand I don't want you to go to bed, mad at me (oh noo, nooo, n

hmmm.xori about that.i cant edit thing for now.
laterzzz:))

summer :(

2009-03-21T05:10:00.000-07:00

~~FUN~~

HOMESTAY...

[ im missing him... ]